According to an article written by Dr. Harry Fisch, a board certified urologist at New York Presbyterian Hospital, a great number of studies show that around 45 % of men ejaculate too quickly. Ejaculating too quickly was previously defined by sex researcher Alfred Kinsey as ejaculation occurring less than two minutes after penetration. But despite the average sex act lasting much less than we initially thought, most men still wish they could last longer. If you truly believe that your inability to last longer is interfering with the quality of your sex life, there are ways you could change that. To help you out, here are 5 moves and techniques that can help you manage your ejaculation time.
1. The classic stop-start technique
James H. Semans first reported the stop-start technique in 1956 as a treatment for premature ejaculation (PE). The technique was later modified with psychotherapy by Masters and Johnson in 1970. It is based on the premise that men with PE have trouble controlling their ejaculation due to anxiety or as a result of learned behavior. The technique is supposed to help you learn when you’re about to reach the “point of no return” and to stop before that point. It’s best to practice this method through masturbation first before trying it out later on during sex. Although this method works great for some, it is not as effective for a great number of men in the long run. Nevertheless, this method is a good way to learn about your body and how it reacts to sexual stimulation.
2. Talk yourself through it
If we consider that PE is a result of fear and anxiety, then using skills frequently employed in cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) may help you gain control over your sexual response. CBT is used in the treatment of various sexual disorders, from erectile dysfunction to anorgasmia and the success rate is pretty high. A large part of CBT sessions in the treatment of PE is helping men understand their dysfunctional views of what normal sex is and how this interferes with their overall sexual performance. Believing that your partner’s sexual satisfaction is solely your responsibility or that you’ll be perceived less of a man due to PE are examples of dysfunctional thinking.
3. The Valsalva maneuver
A rarely talked about technique for men with PE is the Valsalva maneuver. It involves forcing air out of your lungs like when you’re trying to clear your ears while on an airplane. This maneuver apparently reduces sympathetic nervous system arousal. Because the ejaculatory reflex is partially controlled by the sympathetic nervous system, using the Valsalva maneuver when you think you’re getting close to the point of no return may help you delay ejaculation. However, keep in mind that researchers aren’t quite sure if this maneuver really works and some believe that the technique only helps patients distract their thoughts from the sex act by holding their breath.
4. Use thicker condoms
If condoms are your favored choice of birth control, then purchasing thicker ones may do the trick for you. If you don’t use condoms, you may try them as a means of desensitizing yourself until you feel you are confident enough to have longer-lasting sex without them. Many men turn to all kinds of products in the hopes of lasting longer in bed, from topical desensitizing gels to top male enhancement pills that claim to treat PE and some even see condoms as a good way to have longer-lasting sex when they need to.
5. Masturbation with the help of toys
Men with PE are often advised to masturbate before they’re about to have sex in order to last longer. This makes perfect sense when PE is believed to be a result of hypersensitivity, but new studies show that the effect may be even better when using desensitizing masturbation aids (FLIP HOLES). A recent study published in the Asian Pacific Journal of Reproduction found that using the device for 30 minutes for at least 6 weeks helps treat PE. The man should masturbate using the device two times to the point of no return and on the third time he was told to ejaculate. The results seem quite promising as up to 79.9% of the men saw an improvement during sex.
A lot of men suffer from what is now termed premature ejaculation. Many of these men wish to find a way to gain better control over their ejaculation time in order to have more satisfying sex. While most attention regarding sexual dysfunction focuses on problems like erectile dysfunction as apparent by the popularity of programs such as Erect on Demand, very little attention is given to PE. This may explain the apparent lack of understanding and treatment options for PE. The techniques listed here are some of the few options men with PE may find helpful.