How to Tell if You’re Dating a Malignant Narcissist

It’s generally nice to get what you want, and to feel good about yourself. We’re human beings, and we derive a great amount of satisfaction from having things work out for ourselves. 

Fortunately, the great majority of us are able to work within the boundaries of the people around us to achieve these goals. Our immediate needs are balanced by the needs of those around us, and as such, we do not experience an overwhelming sense of self-importance.

Not everyone is like this, however. Some people truly consider themselves to be the most important thing on the face of the planet. As you can probably imagine, this can lead to serious issues in their personal relationships and can make it difficult for people to be around them.

These people are often understood to have narcissistic personality disorder.

    1. What Is Narcissistic Personality Disorder?

Narcissists are generally people who have difficulty understanding compassion and empathy. They are unable to understand or acknowledge the emotional or physical needs of others. This is not to say they are ‘bad’ people – they are simply incapable of accepting the idea that people other than themselves have needs.

Despite this, narcissists often have an extreme need for external validation. They feed upon the attention and admiration of other people – but unfortunately, because of their inability to understand compassion and empathy, they are unable to reciprocate these gifts to other people. 

      1. Symptoms of Narcissistic Personality Disorder

According to the DSM (Diagnostic Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders), there are 9 symptoms of Narcissistic Personality Disorder. To be diagnosed with the condition, you have to display 5 of these 9 symptoms.

These symptoms are:

  • Having an extreme sense of self-importance.
  • Spending a great deal of time fantasizing about their own personal power or positive traits.
  • The belief that one is unique when compared to others, and that because of this uniqueness they deserve to be surrounded by equally powerful individuals
  • A strong need for the approval of others
  • Feeling entitled
  • Frequently exploiting others
  • Being unable to be empathetic or compassionate
  • Being envious
  • Arrogance
    1. Malignant Narcissism

Malignant narcissism is a bit different than standard narcissism – and, unfortunately, it is more likely to be dangerous. People who have malignant narcissistic disorder generally meet the criteria described above, but they are more likely to be aggressive or violent

In short, malignant narcissists are more likely to be a threat to the well-being of others. They are sometimes considered to be a combination of narcissism and antisocial personality disorder, which can lead to a number of symptoms including:

  • Difficulty living within the law
  • Being manipulative, untruthful, or deceptive in personal relationships, especially when these deceptions are simply for their own entertainment
  • Being highly impulsive
  • Being verbally or physically aggressive towards others
  • Ignoring dangers to themselves or to others
  • Being irresponsible
  • Having no regret for harmful actions or bad decisions that have caused problems for others
    1. Am I Dating a Malignant Narcissistic?

If your relationship struggles from some of the following issues, there’s a chance that you might be dating a malignant narcissist.

  • Your partner has no remorse when they have emotionally harmed you
  • Your partner frequently values their own needs over yours
  • Your partner has a history of troubled relationships
  • Your partner feeds off of your compliments
  • They have very few long-term friends
  • They are frequent gaslighters
  • They frequently pick on you

If you have any of these issues, it could be a good idea to seek help from a relationship counselor.

    1. Conclusion

Dating a malignant narcissistic can wreak havoc on your self-esteem. If you think that you’re in a relationship with a malignant narcissistic, consider seeking help from a counselor or therapist.